No naptime routine?

Sure, we have a bedtime routine (baby yoga, bath, jammies, bottle, rocking chair, sleep), but it never occurred to me to have a naptime routine until I read The Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg. It was her Supernanny-like British voice that prompted me to begin one, and it is working like a charm.

Naptime Hippo

Our Naptime Routine: We dim the lighting in the room (lights + shade), we swaddle, we rock and give a bottle if needed, we read a story for as long as she can stand it, then we have a visit from the Naptime Hippo who plays a lullaby when her tail is pulled, then we rock some more play the sleep-fighting game (you know, the one where she cries because she’s tired then eventually konks out), then she’s out! Consistency is absolutely the key here, as for any routine.

Well we’ve been doing this for a few weeks now, since our mini-me was 10weeks old, and the consistency is really starting to pay off…much to my relief. She knows it’s naptime when we begin the routine and is very calm and so much less fussy. Babygirl enjoys the books much more now as she gets older, and one the Naptime Hippo stops by, she is ready to sleep. We might get a tiny peep out of her to protest the nap, but with just a simple re-insertion of the paci, she’s out.

The Result

If you don’t have a naptime routine yet, I highly recommend starting one no matter your child’s age. I can see how helpful it will be when we have babysitters who can follow it, or if I need her to go down for a nap in a strange place…and it’s already paying off for the day-to-day naps. Good luck!The Result of our Naptime Routine

Washing the mom off.

It’s been another long day filled with milky, drooly burp cloths, pee-filled diapers so heavy you could break a window with them, and the never-ending cycle of picking-up, putting-away, and washing. You take a quick glance at the clock, and realize the day is almost over. Is that happiness that’s overcoming you? Well try not to be too excited; you’re supposed to be enjoying every moment of being a mommy especially since it “goes by so fast” as they always say. Still, if the day is almost over, that means your man is coming home soon, which is hopefully something still semi-exciting for you (it’s the little things!).

Because of all your hard work all day, your home is in good enough order and ::gasp::, your little one is napping! Now please take a moment to survey your situation and appreciate how rare moments like these are, where the stars have aligned in a way that would actually allow you to do something not baby or home related, something for that person you so frequently forget about…YOU! If you are fortunate enough to be in this predicament, a second shower for the day is the recommended course of action because admit it, you smell (damn hormones!). And don’t even think about hopping on the laptop for a minute, because this rare window of opportunity will vanish as fast as your little one can spit up.

Instead, what I want you to do, is move the baby-monitor to the bathroom if it’s not already there, and peel off your mom-uniform (you know…yoga pants and a tank-top and/or zip-up depending on the temperature). Toss them into a pile on the floor because you will not be putting those slightly sweaty, mom-funky cloths back on after what’s about to go down. Now, turn on the shower….nice and hot, that’s it. Let the bathroom steam up a bit, but not for too long! You know that baby could realize the paci has fallen out at any moment and begin grunting until you get there, which could turn into a full-on wail if you don’t get there in time, which could lead to a fully awake baby, thereby ruining the nap-time completely which will produce an over-tired, cranky baby and a half-bathed mom. So keep it moving, and get in the shower.

Grab your too-big-because-you-need-a-new-one body poof and squeeze the most creamy, moisturizing, sensual smelling body wash you have. If you just have one body wash, then you need to step your game up. I personally have three to choose from at the moment: A squeaky-clean lavender wash for when I feel contaminated or need to relax (which are often synonymous), a citrus scented get-up-and-go wash with scrubby beads which I often use after a workout or in the morning or when coffee isn’t working, and a luxurious, super sudsy wash that makes me smell like a Victoria’s Secret model looks. In this particular instance, I would choose that last one, but use whatever you have.

Now go ahead and rub and smoosh that body-poof all over your body, in every single nook and cranny, with the goal of producing an extreme amount of frothy bubbles. And don’t be afraid to scrub. You want to be scrubbing with the kind of rigor that will wash the mom off and get you feeling fresh and sexy. If you hear any peeps or squeaks on the baby-monitor, take an extra moment to indulge a bit in this scrub-down until you’re sure that you’re needed, at which point, immediately abort mission and sprint (safely) into the baby’s room to see how you can best salvage the nap.

If you’re lucky enough to not yet hear anything from your little one at this point, then bravo, well-timed and executed. Okay, now quickly rinse off, wash your face, shave anywhere that could be visible or touched before your next shower, and get the hell out of there. Dry yourself off at least 35% and immediately begin to lotion up. This is a very important step, so make sure it smells really good and enticing. Go check on the baby, put some cloths on (it’s okay to put on a new mom-uniform, but do add something MILF-y like diamond earrings and a touch of mascara).

You still have a few minutes before your man gets home, so go sit where you usually sit, or do what you usually do, relishing in how gloriously self-indulgent your 12 minutes of Me Time was. When your man comes in, just let him smell your freshness…perhaps he will even feel your soft cleanliness if he touches your arm during his “Hello” Smooch. In addition to your delicate Me Time, that’s what you did all this for, ladies. Not because you intended on getting laid later that night (would be a lovely side-effect though!). Instead, you did this to remind your man how sexy and tempting you can be (trust me, he noticed and might have even got a semi). And to show off your supreme mom-skills that are so acute that you can have the entire home sparkling, the baby calm, and be just chillin’ out being fresh and sexy when he comes home, unlike pretty much every other day when he comes home, but we won’t get into that right here and now.

But really, you did this for you. To wash the mom off of you and feel un-mommy for the entire 2-3min between the time you started scrubbing the mom off and the time you checked on the baby right after the lotion-up. That is, unless, you were beckoned on the baby-monitor before you even got all the mom off. If that’s the case, try again in a few weeks, when the stars might align this way again…believe me those 2-3min will be worth your effort!

So that didn't really go how I thought it would…

I can honestly say that my childbirth experience was traumatic for me. I had worked my entire pregnancy toward a pain-med free, intervention-free, natural childbirth. I would have loved to give birth to my daughter in a Birth Center with a Midwife…but due to my lack of funding for better insurance, I was stuck with an OB at a Hosptial. These are two drastically different types of care. Now these are sweeping generalizations, but you will find them to be mostly true in all cases. OB’s are diagnostic surgeons who look for and fix problems–and they consider pregnancy and birth to be a ‘problem’. Midwives provide care for mothers going through the natural process of childbirth and take on a very humanistic approach toward being part of the experience. Watch the eye-opening documentary, The Business of Being Born, if you want to be schooled on the realities of the birthing industry.

So nothing went as planned. I thought my water might have broke so into L+D we went. After a inconclusive test to ensure it was really my water, I spent hours groppling with the overworked nurses as to whether or not it was my water that I thought had broke. If it was, I needed to start antibiotics because I was GBS+ (a common bacteria that simply requires the mother to have IV antibiotics during labor). If it wasn’t my water, then I wanted to get back to my home and go through early labor there instead of in the confines and timetable of the hospital. But then I stood up and went to the bathroom and let’s just say at that point I was 100% sure my water had broke!

The events that followed included, (in sequential order), continued crabbiness from my nurses, botched attempts at sticking my IV in my forearm arm which resulted in a busted valve and gushing blood, my baby’s heartrate dropping, nurses urgently jamming the IV into my hand, oxygen mask on my face and breathing like my baby’s and my life depended on it, baby’s heart rate fine, contractions every 3min, 3cm dilated, baby’s heart rate drops again, oxygen mask on, my OB comes in…and off to OR I go for an emergency cesarean.

The actual operation took a whole 3 minutes and out came my crying, healthy, perfect, and beautiful baby girl. I was so happy to see her, although “happy” is the most unworthy word to use to describe how I felt. No words actually do the experience justice…just know it was other-worldy. If you are a parent, then you know!

I’m not sure if they gave me morphine or what, but the events directly following my daughter’s birth are quite groggy. If it wasn’t for photos and my fiance’s rundown (who by the way looked really hot in his OR scrubs!), I wouldn’t remember much. But what I do remember is the feeling of meeting the most amazing creature I’ve ever seen for the first time and being amazed that she is what I was carrying for 9 months…had I known SHE was what I was growing, I would never have complained about things like how hard it was to get out of bed to pee for the fifth time in one night.

EDITED TO ADD: The description above was written just weeks after the delivery and at that point my dreams of wanting 3 or 4 children had completely deflated. It was so hard to be a mom the first week or so because of how sore I was from the c-section, and it was just a really bad experience for me. I was saddened that I no longer wanted to go through pregnancy and delivery again for fear of the same thing happening, or worse. However, it is now over 3 months after my experience and I am pleased to say I will do it again…watching a child bloom is worth anything, it is truly a blessing and I can’t wait to add to our family (in a few years!).

So began my journey of motherhood, I had no idea what I was in for…

Pregnancy Survey!

Is this your first baby? Yes!

Were you trying to get pregnant? Nooo! lol

How far along were you when you found out? 5 weeks, I just knew…

What was your reaction? Burst into very tragic tears…”Holysh!t, how did this happen…how will my life change, how will I make this work so we’re still happy, what will my man think of this, how will it effect our relationship.”

Who was the first person you told? My bff Megan who calmed me down and pushed me to tell my bf immedietely, I was scared to tell my bf because I didn’t know how he’d react and felt like he might be upset and leave me. He didn’t and now we are engaged hehe, love that man!

How did you tell the father? “I took a pregnancy test because my period was late and it was positive” lol

What was his reaction? Very supportive, but as rattled as I was. We just stared at the ceiling a few nights in a row going over everything in our heads and talking. He was and is a total rock for me, first time in my life anyone other than mom has been that for me.

When is your due date? July 5th!

Did you have any morning sickness? Just nausea but it certainly did suck.

Did you want a boy or girl? I didn’t really have an opinion at first, and initially hoped for an “older brother” in the fam, but then I just knew it was a girl, so did DF, then I began to crave that it was a girl.

Do you know what you’re having? A girl!!!

Do you plan on a natural or medicated birth? Planning natural, studying Hypnobabies with my birth-Doula, and will be okay with meds if real complications arise.

Are you scared about labor? No, I plan to be prepared and am really in touch with my body so I’m looking forward to the challenge and hoping for the best!

Do you think you will cry when you see the baby for the first time? Not sure, if not right at that moment, probaby soon thereafter.

Who is going to be with you?: My DF, doula, Dr, and nurses…mom wants to be in delivery room but I don’t know about that…perhaps during labor but not the actual final pushing stage is where my head is at on that currently.

Are you going to video tape it?: Not that actual crowning and emergence of the baby haha…but I am sure DF may have his vid camera there taking clips throughout the process, I won’t mind that 🙂

Do you know what you will say to the baby when you first hold it?: Probably sing “happy birthday” like my mom did 🙂

Do you have a name picked out?: Regina Jade…calling her Jade although now Regina is growing on me too!

Is your baby going to be named after anyone?: Yes, her grandpa is Reginald(Reggie) Sr, her daddy is Reginald(Reggie) Jr, and she is Regina 🙂 It means Queen.

What do you think the baby will be a “daddy’s girl/boy” or a “mommy’s girl/boy”?: I think she will LOVE doing girly things with mama if she’s into that, but definitely a daddy’s-girl, which will be really great.

Going to friend's babyshower while pregnant myself…

I really college roomie’s baby shower on Sunday. I got to see the girls–the four of us were roommates, met in the dorms, good friends, worked together at Trader Joe’s, etc. And it was male and female so there was lots of drinks and very little games haha. I totally enjoyed myself!

However, I must say–it was really bizzare to be there and be pregnant at someone else’s shower. The reasoning is this, let’s see if you can crawl up into my mind and dip down into my heart… One of the joys of pregnancy is sharing it with your friends! It’s a really joyous situation. I’m so used to seeing my dear friends and it’s always a mini celebration–one gets a certain amount of attention when pregnant, and I like it because it’s not really ME as the center of attention, but rather it’s my baby and she deserves it!

So to be somewhere, seeing friends I’ve known for 10yrs yet haven’t seen in nearly a year, and feel the need to downplay my prenancy and excitement…is strange. I felt the need to do that because clearly it wasn’t my shower, the day will come when it is my shower, and also there wasn’t excitement being generated for my baby anyway. Most likely no one really knew I was pregnant and just thought my body is really shaped like this (how sad!) I felt a bit left out. Kinda second rate. I will definitely learn from this and keep it in mind if I ever have a pregnant friend at my shower, because it really is so special.

You know what it’s like? (And I’ve been in this situation a million times also). Your bday is June 11th, your friends’ is June 9th. Her party is on June 10th, yet there is no shared celebration–it’s only really her part and no one else there really knows it’s your bday at midnight. That is why I am a big fan and proponant of the joint-bday celebration…or at least making a major announcement, giving them a sparkly hat too or something. Or perhaps I look after the feelings of others too much, or more than the average human.

Note: The expecting parents, and party hostess did do a wonderful job of acknowledging my pregnancy. This post is more of what went on in MY (vulnerable, emotional, hormonal) head.

Waiting to find out sex? No.

The main argument I hear to wait to find out the sex of the baby is the glorious surprise at birth. This is simply not a priority to me. Why you may ask?

1. I cannot wait for these sorts of things…I like to know what’s going on, I like to be prepared, and let’s face it–I’m still impatient.

2. I want to further bond with the child I’m carrying and stop calling the baby “it”

3. I want to buy cute gender-specific items

4. There is already enough surprise and suspense built into the experience of a first-time childbirth, I do not need additional mystery. For example, what will the baby look like, how long will it take to first cry, what will the cry sound like, what will it feel like to look into baby’s eyes, how will it feel to hold the baby, how will my fiance be during birth, how will the birth experience be, how will the baby react to being in the world on its own for the first time, what will the baby’s hair look like right away…that’s PLENTY.

So I will be finding out the sex asap, waiting about a month from now for when I get the ultrasound to tell me. MAYBE with future children I will wait.

My prediction, along with 98% of everyone else I’ve spoken to, thinks its a girl. We shall see!

New Symptom: Heartburn

Ok I wouldn’t call it heartburn as much as I would call it a digestive problem. It’s new for me, but common in pregnancy starting the 2nd Tri. Basically it feels like something is stuck back behind my ribs…like I wanna push it down or burp but neither occur. I hear this can be accompanied by a burning feeling, which I don’t have. I’m taking Tums.

I also plan to inhale some incredibly spicy, delicious mexican food from our favorite truck up the street. We’ll see how that goes over.

Prenatal Dr. Appt…from the mans' perspective

Check this out, humerously written by the father of my child during his first visit INSIDE an OB/GYN Dr office. It’s here on his blog, The H.A.M. Report.

2nd Trimester…when a lot of stuff will happen.

Well I’m now officially into my 2nd Trimester! I’m 14 weeks and 2 days pregnant 😀 Things are moving along nicely, went to the Dr a second time, all is well! I would say I generally feel really good. I have much MORE energy and much LESS nausea…which I hear is a big bonus of the 2nd Trimester for some lucky women. My baby is currently about 3.5″ long, about the size of a woman’s fist or a lemon. This week it’s learning to make facial expressions and pee haha.

This is what's going on at 14 Weeks 🙂

I’m currently a bit irked that this man who works out of our office said to me this morning, “baby like to eat!” in reference to my morning bagel. I mean sheesh, it’s not like I had 4 bagels in front of me!? Definitely annoying to hear comments about eating a lot or anything like that when I feel like I’ve gained 20lbs in the last 2mo. Ugh.

Things are a bit in limbo. I am patiently awaiting to “pop” so that I have a real baby belly on my instead of bloat belly. I can’t wait until I can feel the baby move as well, that will be so exciting! But for now I just feel large and not very pregnant. It helps to talk about it or get asked about it, because it reminds me I AM in fact pregnant. This is the trimester where the baby moves, the round belly forms, and I find out the sex–lots of things going on…just not yet.

Much of the cramping issues that were highlighting the 1st Tri are also gone. Although now I’m in the wonderful world of muscles being pulled in my abdoman and groin area when I move after not moving for awhile.  A little annoying, but so far nothing has been so bad that it’s debilitating (my new fav word). Some of these headaches, however, have gotten me down.

Cravings include: Orange juice, fruit, pastries.

Exercise includes: Not much over break to be honest. I will be back in the gym this week, it seems so pointless though.

Nutrition: I wouldn’t say I’m not nutritious, but that rather that my nutrition is paired with a lot of crap. I’ve totally given in to what I used to eat that caused me to gain…dozens…of pounds. Which is scary, but hey–I’m aware I can shed 45 and will shed that and more post-baby. For now, I’m indulging–it’s too much pressure and stress to try to eat healthy all the time while pregnant.

Favorite Indulgence: my daily Whole Wheat Bagel

Wait…so this is real?

Ok so the fact that I’ll be having a baby just became very real upon receiving a sex-neutral onsie from Reggie’s Aunt! Just looking at it and realizing there will be a baby in there soon is CRAZY I tell you. CRAZZZZY. And then I did some calculations and realized that this will all happen in about 6months!?!??! That’s not very long! Don’t get me wrong, I’m still ready and way excited but wow…it’s really real.